Monday, March 16, 2015

Review: If by Nina G. Jones

If by Nina G. Jones

If is a new adult romance, not erotica.

Someone hadn't scarred my face.
I hadn’t followed my dreams to LA.
That tweaker hadn't attacked that homeless guy.
I hadn't invited a stranger over for Thanksgiving.
I hadn’t fallen in love.

If I hadn’t lost him.
I hadn’t gone for that drive.
I saw the world like everyone else.
My “genius” wasn’t slowly destroying me.
I had just walked away before I could ever know her.
She hadn’t ignited the spark.

If the spark didn’t ignite the madness.




In many ways, this book reminds me of Find You in the Dark that touch on the similar theme, but I would say If feels more mature and had more layers and depths to it. Is a story about love, heartbreak, forgiveness and healing. 

"'If' is unfulfilled potential. It's dreams that didn't come true."

Bird loves dancing and living with a scarred face. A face that become a major roadblock in her life. But she is tenacious in living up to her dreams to become a successful dancer in LA. A chance encounter with a heroic homeless guy brought on an endless possibilities into her life. 

Ash was gifted with an extraordinary talent that make him see the world unlike everybody else. But he is living with a curse. A curse that led to his ultimate downfall. He is homeless. He is a drifter. All he want is to be invisible and to be gone. 

"I fight so hard not to exist, but she was forcing me to. She was forcing me to partake in life."

But the girl bursting with the colorful aura beacon him towards her.

"She was a literal star, beaming with light, walking on the earth, gracing it with her presence. She was the light we reached out to grasp, but were never able to touch. That's what Bird was: A fallen star. A dancing star."

Bird and Ash relationship started from her wanting to get to know her homeless savior better and her persistency in engaging him finally wore him out. Their love build from endless hours of dance and paints, they inspire the best in each other. 

"You're going to be amazing one day, and I get to watch you grow in front of my eyes."

But what Bird didn't know is her artistic boyfriend is sick. A sickness that is invisible to the naked eye. 

"Ash, I just want you to be okay."

Of course, like anybody else, I know Nina G. from her dark erotica Debt. Although If is nothing like Debt, is not even an erotica, there isn't any erotic scene at all, but I love every page. Nina was able to paint a vivid pictures with her words that make me immerse in a pool of emotions and feelings. I can picture Bird dance as if she can float and Ash paint like a manic artist. I can feel their selfless love for each other and the heartache over heartache over heartache. Throughout the journey, I am thinking how many times did Nina wanted to torture me, I felt like my heart getting pummel over and over and over. I confess, a large part of the book was depressing, but that's what make everything much more meaningful towards the end. I truly feel the author versatility by reading two of her books now. She can write a hot as fuck erotica, she can write a tear jerker NA that rip your heart out. What's next Nina? 

"Maybe 'If' isn't such a bad word. It's a word that precludes infinite possible."

Rating 5/5